Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Feel so sian now... 2 hours of break... class starting at 3... the way i see all my friends working so hard... i felt so bad... i'm so lazy... but just whine wuld be of no use... action speaks louder than words..
these few weeks .. i feel tht i am foolish, stupid and totally wasting my time... foolish enuf to
go online evry night and surf the net for nth...hoping he wuld send me a msg to start a conversation ... i even gave upp my favourite tv ... usually i would watch tv till late midnight then go to sleep... now ... why i'm so foolish... stupid? i am totally wasting my time... i shuld hav taken tht time tu revise my lecture notes ... read upp on my tb ... do my tutorial qns.. instead of letting him fill up my mind... butt actually its just abt few weeks .. the like is not vry vry strong since its one-sided... am i able to give him upp? sometimes cant even concentrate in lectures since the lectures are so boring and dry ... i tend to drift off and eventually feel sadd as he fill my mind.. hahas.. always say wan fang qi butt couldn... trying vry hard le... i have went thru this kindof pain 2 yrs ago and it lasted for abt 2 yrs ... a fruitless wait in the end... its pain enuf and i dun wan to go thru it again.. wann tu get out of it now while i have not gone so deep into it ... thou its not gona be easy ... butt i'll try ... sometimes really hope tht someone would just come along to take me away to somewhere where i 'm protected and totally loved.. studies shuld actually be my main focuse for now... i noe.. butt sometimes feeling cant be controlled... after 2 yrs ... i finally found the feeling of liking someone... yet it turn out tu be hurtful... painful... ... someone... guide me back... i'm lost ... lost ...
it ended @ 2:19 PM
I will be waiting
